Jokes for Teachers (I Won’t Judge You for LOLing)
Home » Education

Jokes for Teachers (I Won’t Judge You for LOLing)

Written by 5 March 2012

Jokes for Teachers (I Won’t Judge You for LOLing)

The longer I work around educators, the more teacher or education related jokes I hear.  

Awhile ago, I started jotting them all down.  

This list is what I've come across in the past month or so...

They're silly, they're fun, and they're safe to use around students.  


  1. When a teacher asked the six year old student why his handwriting wasn’t as neat as usual, he responded, “I’m trying a new font.”
  2. The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference.  He acquired his size from eating too much pi.
  3. How was the Roman Empire cut in half? With a pair of Caesars.
  4. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.
  5. Albert Einstein's Mother: But it's your senior picture. Can't you do something about your hair? Styling gel, mousse, something...?
  6. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class, because it was a weapon of math disruption.
  7. There are 10 kinds of mathematicians. Those who can think binarily and those who can't.
  8. A neutron walked into a bar and asked, "How much for a drink?" The bartender replied, "For you, no charge."
  9. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.
  10. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.
  11. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.
  12. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.
  13. Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, 'I've lost my electron.' The other says 'Are you sure?' The first replies, 'Yes, I'm positive.'
  14. Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain during a root canal? His goal: transcend dental medication.
  15. There was the person who sent ten puns to friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh.  No pun in ten did.
  16. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
  17. Pi to i: "Get real!"  i to Pi : "Get rational!"
  18. Physics quote of the day: Anything that doesn't matter has no mass.
  19. Why were the early days of history called the dark ages? Because there were so many knights.

  What can you add to this list?  Leave me your favorite joke in a comment on this post.


Share this post with your friends and colleagues:
Jokes for Teachers (I Won’t Judge You for LOLing)


  • Jen Petras said:

    What do you do with a dead Chemist? You barium.

    Kimberly Reply:

    Good one, Jen!